Bourgeoise Blues

I make it a habit to wait until everyone is sleeping so I can read my mail in peace. I received a hefty envelope from school- telling me what I've already assessed- I am entering student loan repayment. Since I hit hard times from having not been able to get financial aid for a few years, I took out loans in the name of borrowed wisdom. As I impatiently tore away at the envelope, I envisioned an al-pacino look-alike banging on my door shouting "I know you're in there.. you owe us 104.00 u hussy!!" Oh well.. serves me right to acquire the only debt that is unexcusable under ANY circumstances. It's okay though. A promise is a promise.

While I am settling into Grad school, I haven't given thought to what i'll do workwise. ::SIGH:: This sucks. Each plan outlined in my paperwork seems outrageous because I'm looking at finishing the payoff sometime in 2045 or so, at which time I will probably be gumming through prunes and sippin' vegetable juice in hopes of keeping up with my budgeting practices. Hubby tells me not to worry and I can't help but laugh. Me?? Not worry? I'm like borderline "Monk" right about now. I worry about EVERYTHING. This new bill on my horizon will cost me about 150/mth more. Oh well, at least I can claim it on my taxes?

The voices in my head offer pieces of credible advice... now to choose which one suits:

The Financial Planner in me says "Pay off the loan now (I have the full amount in different liquid accounts) and set aside 150 each month until 2045. You'll have a nice spot of change to put into a HYSA like Capital One or ING.

The Entrepreneur in me says "F*** Dat! Use the money you'd pay in full to yield more cash and use the tax credits. Okay.. if you want to pay more.. shell out like 200 bucks a month instead of 100."

The Procrastinator in me says: "Get to playing FF3. Wait until the very last minute to pay and that's that!"

The Frugal Fraulein in me says: "Fill out forebearance paper work until you get a physical job. Go out there and get yourself a part time just to pay this 150"

I say "forget it all" , flip them off individually, and will now go back to sleep. It's quite early, you know.